The Best Coast Bias

Why the Bay Area has the Best Fans

The West Coast Bias. How is it that we are neglected in the sports world? ESPN's fascination with the ever-irrelevant Tim Tebow and the next city in Dwight Howard's path of failed expectations is reminiscent of Lizzie McGuire's Ethan Kraft obsession. Win two World Series in three years? ESPN puts on a 10 minute segment on the Lakers' 0-8 preseason. Cities like Boston, New York, Los Angeles, and Chicago overshadow the diehards of Northern California. I hate to sound like a Gretchen Wieners rant on Caesar, but our fans are the most unique & live without the contingency of having to win a championship to appreciate our teams (yes, Laker Nation, that would be you). So while we play the role of Gordo, we will continue to root for our teams, with the realization that someone will and should take notice.

San Francisco Giants: WE ARE JUST BETTER LOOKING

Bearded men, according to a University of New South Wales study, are found to be more attractive than men with shaven faces. Don't believe me? Click here. You can't argue with science. Besides, how could you hate on breast cancer awareness? 

Oakland Athletics: WE HAVE AMAZING DANCE MOVES

No Trevor Cahill or Gio Gonzalez? We're just going to lean all the way to the first place in the AL West. Look, I've been to an Oakland A's game, it sucks. I've seen more people at the library on a Friday night than I have O.co Coliseum, but you can't hate on people having fun in such a janky stadium. Bernie away before Brad Pitt trades your star players to pay for more adopted children.

Oakland Raiders: GUYS CAN WEAR MAKEUP

I mean, I would really want to hide behind makeup after that Tuck Rule game if I was a Raider fan too. All seriousness aside, guy liner, spikes, and skulls are pretty badass. While the team itself isn't too intimidating, nobody in the right mind, outside of a non-medicated Ron Artest, would mess with. 

Golden State Warriors: Jessica Alba, Jessica Alba, & Jessica Alba

What team can brag that AskMen.com's #1 most desirable woman of 2006 roots for our team? Her appearance at the 2007 Playoffs had pre-adolescents, pimply teenagers, and grown men jumping for joy. Jessica Alba's one-time appearance trumps Jack Nicholson & Spike Lee's seasonal courtside seats any day. Thanks Honey Daniels, you're the best.

San Jose Sharks: DIVINE INTERVENTION

If Joseph Gordon-Levitt can win with just angels, imagine what we could do with a little bit of direct intervention. How could you possibly go wrong with him rooting for us? Let's just make sure we signal when we're in trouble. 

San Francisco 49ers: WE GOT THE HARDWARE

So we haven't won since 1994, but our five Superbowl championships are still tied for second among NFL franchises. Though we love winning, that doesn't deter the Niner Faithful from our unconditional support. The evidence? Post-Jeff Garcia quarterbacks: Tim Rattay, Ken Dorsey, Cody Pickett, Trent Dilfer, Shaun Hill, Chris Weinke, J.T. O'Sullivan, Troy Smith. Sure, we booed pre-Harbaugh Alex Smith, but who wouldn't have when Hellen Keller could've made a more accurate pass. While we are on the cusp of a sixth championship, expect our cheers to be even louder.

The Bayless Babbles is authored by UC Merced & USC Alumni Justin Cheng. 

Email: baylessbabbles@gmail.com 

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